the life of a fool...

The Nite...

2008-08-06T11:42:00.000-07:00

i got no idea why am i still awake at this time.Ahhhhhhhhh...i usually sleep at 12, and i can easily go into my dreamland.But not today.Wat happen to me?Sick?guess so...must be lonely. Mr lonely,please leave me.So to the mosquitoes. Its so irritating. Got my cheque today, so happy tht i juz hit my target of the month, ngam ngam...haha...but soon it will go back to zero in my bank account.Too many things to buy,too many birthdays coming soon,too many suprises or events,etc.Thts y money is always not enough.well,better see who is still awake in msn.kacau kacau 1st...haha...

Day at market

2008-07-26T09:07:00.000-07:00

The day which ruin my mood at market.I was accompany grandmom to market this morning.I woke up early, mood was good(blur actually),got the parking(lucky), and everything seems fine.However,a chinese old man,i would say he is not a gentleman.why?my grandmom is alomst 80 and she is weak which cant stand long.So,i have to accompany her to everywhere, juz to make sure she don fall down suddently.Well,this stupid old man was behind me and wanted to pass through us.Guess wat he said in english.'Oi, don block the road.'WTF,cant see i'm with my grandmom.i'm not purposely wanna block the road.Besides that,cant u use 'excuse me' instead of 'oi'.For an english educated man,cant believe he is so rude to an old women.Before i leave, i stared at him and scolded him in my heart.You know what mean.Geram!!!

can't smile without you

2008-07-24T07:43:00.000-07:00

i went for a movie on tuesday.As usual, alone.Haha.Hellboy, a cool movie.Well, what i wanna say is, i love the song in this movie.Can't smile without you by barry manilow.Its lovely.I cant believe i will say tht.Haha.But is true, this song is nice.Altough is a sad song, a bit sad.haha.I try to search for this song.My lucky day,loh(my classmate),we have the same taste man.haha.He already got the song because of this movie.So this few days i only listen to this song repeatly.Trust me.i'm not inlove with anyone yet.But this song is so touching and i like the music.If u wanna listen to this song,try to ask from me.I can send u.Only certain ppl will like it(ppl with special taste).haha.Juz kidding.

Tagged by yuet mui

2008-07-17T08:39:00.000-07:00

Instructions: Remove 1 question from below and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post.

1. At what age do you wish to marry?
- 30 to 35

2.If you can turn into anything, what do you wish you can turn into?
- can i turn into some millionaire or billionaire's son?so i will b rich!!!

3. What job are u doing now?
- student...plus food recycling and oxygen sucking side...

4.Where is the place that you want to go most?
-Geneva in german...CARS!!!!

5.If you have one dream to come true, what would it be?
- i agree to yuet mui...wish every wish will come true...

6.Do you believe in seeing the rainbow after the rain?
- erm...no idea...i should believe when i got a gf...haha

7.what are you afraid to lose the most right now?
-currently wat i have...everything...

8. What cheers you up for the rest of the day?
- delicious food...luxury cars...joys with frens...

9.If you meet someone you love, would you confess to him/her?
- erm..depends...if i know she in love with me too...then i wil do it...haha...

10.List out three good things of the person who tagged you.
- omg...thts difficult for me...haha...alright...helpful...smart(super smart)...n adorable...haha...

11. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
- smart...easygoing...love to smile...cute...kind...most important...she loves me!!!

12.What type of person do you hate the most?
- Those who wear a mask on their face...fake

13.What would you do if you won a million dollars?
- half for investment...the other half keep in bank...smart hah

14. what is your ambition?
- rest in peace...haha...b4 tht...successful in my carrer of coz...

15.What would you wanna be after you're dead?
- sleep..of coz...wat else...

16. If you have a chance, which part of your character would you like to change?
- lazyness....lack of self-motivation...

17. what is your favourite color?
- erm..blue..white...

18.What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
- Family...

19. Do you believe in fate?
-yup..thts y i'm looking n searching for my the other 1 tht willing to walk together with me for my entire life...

20. What would you do if tomorrow was the last day of the world?
- spend my day with family n frens...apologize to those i have hurt or coz any misunderstanding...hope they forgive me...

after so long...

2008-07-13T07:39:00.000-07:00

ya...after so long, i'm back to this blog. Haha. My fren told me tht my blog is so emo. Well, i agree with tht. I blog when i'm emo, sad, lonely. OK then, this time is wat?This time, i hurt my best fren, my really best fren in my life. I hurt her twice. I think i'm a most stupid, bastard, useless guy in this world. She is a nice gul, she really don deserve this. I hate myself. I really do. I always think, why am i here in this beautiful world but i have ruined everything?I think god have treated me so good. But i don think i deserve it. I'm juz useless. Sc, i hope u can forgive me. But if u don, i hope u can forget me or hate me as much as u can. In the end, I'm a bastard. U don wish to have this kind of fren in ur life. I really hope u can happy forever, no more crying, no more sadness in ur life. God bless u.

wat i wan?

2007-09-14T00:11:00.000-07:00

exam finally over...but i nvr stop of missing the gul...eventhough when i'm studying..i put her photo as my wallpaper...so when i free...i can look at her...we seldome chat on exam week..i know she need to study...concentrate...so do i...but everytime i juz cant stop myself...holding the phone...finish typing the msg..but scare disturb her...so i save in the draft box...haiz...she got bf...wat i wan actually?i keep thinking tht..u love a gul...not necessary to couple...most important is she happy bout her life...but i juz cant stop thinking bout her...when she dance with other guys in ruums...i jealous....n worried...haiz...wat i wan?!!!!i think of getting out of this...but i cant...i juz cant...when i tried...she will msg me...then i continue to b a fool...fool...wat i wan???i wan a gul tht i love...care bout me...love me....let me feel tht i very important for her...juz a simple thing...but i know wat u wan..u will nvr get tht...especially love...love...a miserable thing in human life...yet so sweet...yet so sad...haiz...sometimes i really think of being gay...at least i wont have any feel on guls...tht make u so pathetic...haiz...

unwelcome person...

2007-08-31T07:29:00.000-07:00

weird title hah?but is true...coz i'm the unlucky 1...y do i say so?mayb is juz my own problem...it should b i think...ok...lets start the story..i took the acca course with my best fren...we joined the same class..coz his frens got some trouble...so they went into another class...i choose to stay with him as my exclassmates r all in a group...from tht moments onwards...my nightmare had started...well..i don know its unlucky or lucky...lucky becoz i have a love at 1st sight with my classmate...n then...i discover she has a bf...haha...funny...well..this is not important anymore as i already give up..i juz wanna know she is happy with her bf...or anything..thts all i wanna see...back to the story...our semester almost finish n we got to know most of our classmates...but...i don think the classmates like me...i can feel tht..or sense tht...they like my fren more than me...well...as i say from the beginning...is juz my own problem...stupid...i think becoz of jealousy...haiz...y i say tht they don like me?for example...it happened juz few days ago...we planned to go out n eat after class...so my fren n i going to drive...almost all of them wanna sit his car...we actually reached my fren's car before mine...everybody like wanna squeeze into his car...nobody follow me to my car...isn't it sad when u see this scene?when they know they cant squeeze in..they walked to my car sadly...disppointed...after the meal...some of them went to buy somthing...n i asked who wanna sit my car go out 1st...coz still got place...n they cant squeeze in anymore...they like rather stand...don feel like getting into my car...the situation really sucks...luckly my jiejie who sit my car reached...n she juz get in..if not...i really don know wat to do...haiz...am i tht bad?unwelcome?tht make every1 hate me?some of them even show me their angry face...pretend tht i'm invisible...i feel like not welcome by them..so sad....haiz...is it becoz i have broke a gul's heart...tht every1 have to think tht i'm bad?becoz i have several gf tht makes u think tht i'm playboy?not serious bout relationship?something tht cannot discover before they start thier relationship..once the relationship started..n u discover tht u cannot stand the gul...is better tell her the truth rather than continue the relationship..couple life is wat u learn n discover everything bout the other partner..once u cannot stand it..u can choose to leave or continue..but u choose to continue...u must think properly tht u really can stand it till both of u marry?i'm looking for my wife...the other partner tht willing to stay with me till we grow old...die...thts y once i know i cant stand it..i choose to leave..mayb i'm selfish..but if i don happy with it..it make the gul not happy too...y dont juz tell the truth n let her know early..so we still can b frens...i juz don get it...i don even have a relationship with 2 or more guls at the same time...i juz looking for my the other partner of my life...haiz..even my best fren don understand me...n i feel tht he has changed..or mayb i have changed...we cant really talk to each other anymore..instead of some bullshit things...haiz...this sem i feel lonely..sad...moody all the times...bout the gul i like...bout fren..bout classmates...omg..n i cant concentrate on studies...god...will u help me?pls let me know wat to do...i scare i cant stand it anymore...i got 2 years to go...n i feel like dying...walking dead in college...i try my best...i try to b nice to every1...but wat i get?nth...n every1 seems to like cl more than me...i think they hate me more then any1...this is my worst semester after all...wat to do?i pray for my the better day will come to me soon..mayb lucky day...n i miss u...so much...even i see u in my dreams...see u in the movies...haiz...but too bad...u have ur love 1...n i shall not spoil it...well..wat i can say is...god bless u...i hope i can see u smile everyday...thts enough for me...

i'm back...

2007-08-21T07:53:00.000-07:00

finally...got my own blog now...a fool's blog...haha...wat should i write about?no one is gonna come here n read bout my blog also...but...this is the place where i can express my feelings...sadness,happiness,loneliness...like wat the hong kong drama...the scene tht the couples hurt each other...they blog and talk bout their feelings..especially the guy...title of the blog..days without my gul...is kind of sad...but it is so true...u blog not becoz u r sad...it is becoz u r lonely...i got tht feeling nowadays...since i have got into advanced...things have changed...buddies r not around...so many things need to think n settle...haiz...i feel like i have being miss out all the times..is it i not tht talkative?cant tell jokes?bored?must b...thts y i'm not welcome by others...they don think of me when there r interesting plans...wont ask u out...if anything need u to help them...they will come to u...wats tht man?i'm sick of it...every1 has a mask on thier face...i really don know who can b trusted n rely on...mayb thts juz a life of a fool should b...